Every meal time. Every time. Without fail. Someone spills their drink. It may be in the first few seconds after having sat down. It may be well into the meal. But you can put money on the fact that at some point in time, every meal, drink will be spilled.
I have come to the conclusion that mistakes will be made. Quite often. Not by the kids. By us. As parents.
Here are a few things I have learned.
Whatever you are making for dinner is not what they want. Even if they asked for it specifically.
The clothes you have chosen for your child/ren are offensive. They most definitely did not want to wear that outfit, even if it has, up until this point, been their favourite.
Your child will tell you they 'actually' want their sandwich cut into squares mere seconds after you have cut it into triangles. At their request.
When putting your child to bed, if you put their doona on they will want it off. If you leave it off they will want it on.
Don't sing. Ever. Your kids hate it.
Anything, and I mean anything, can be a weapon. Even a marshmallow in the right hands can cause grievous bodily harm. Marshmallow flour in the eye is no picnic.
If you accidentally knock your child's finger with a DVD case, even kissing it better 1000 times will not stop that child from telling total strangers that you hit them with a container.
If you mock "eat up" your child they will have no hesitation in telling people that you bit them.
If you value balance, neatness and order in your world, don't let your children decorate the Christmas tree.
Threats don't work. Bribery does.
Anything you have ever said around the children, ever, has the potential to return, at any given point in time, to be repeated by one or more of these children if it serves their purpose well.
I could keep going. I shall leave it at that for now. But there will be more. Oh yes, there will.
For there is oh so much more.
So much.
Kids. Keeping parents baffled since forever.
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