Tuesday 14 January 2014

Dear Mother Nature

Go home. You're drunk.

Seriously.

It is 9.42pm at this time of writing, and currently it is 35 degrees outside.

Today the majority of the time was spent sitting at around 42 degrees, with a small venture into the 43 zone.

I am not built for this weather. I am vitamin D deficient because I don't go out in the sun. Because I hate it so much. Because I am pretty well albino and just burn. Plus it's hot. And makes you sweat. And is horrid.

I so prefer winter.

But we have to endure this next week of horrific temperatures in Melbourne, as do many South Aussies, and other places around this fabulously shaped country of ours.

Have you ever tried to eat a pancake until it was shaped like Australia? Tis a bit fun. Try it. You'll surprise yourself. In more ways than one.

So Miss 5 has been coming to work with me for the last few days. Why? They didn't get the numbers to run the holiday program. So there you go.

You know I never realised just how much she talked. I knew she could talk. I knew the others could talk too. But one on one, holy mothballs batman. She could talk the hind legs off a donkey.

And it was constant. At one stage I wondered if she was circular breathing. Then wondered about her future career as a trumpeter or didgeridoo player.

"Muuuum. Do you like my drawing?"

"Yes baby it's beautiful."

"You can see all the different colours and I did this here and that there and I think if I do another one I'll do that there and that there and, um, did you say it was morning tea time yet? No? Oh. Ok. I just thought I would check. Can I please have another puzzle thing? What are you doing? Can I see? Where's your boss? Why isn't he here yet? What was that noise? I think someone is on the roof. Stomping. Can I go and see?"

And that was the one conversation and took approximately 35 seconds.

Welcome. To. My. World.

Yesterday was a warm day too. Not like today. But still pretty hot. My bedroom is the only one without a fan, because I give the fans to the kids so they are more comfortable. So I opted to sleep on the sofa in the lounge room because it was far cooler.

I woke up at 5 with Miss 4 lying beside me, asleep. And wondered why I couldn't move in my dream. You know how you have those dreams that somehow incorporate reality? Like the dream where you can hear an alarm going off in the building down the street and you rush over to try and see what is going on and in your dream there are people breaking in and glass shattering and all sorts of whatnot until you realise that the alarm in your dream is actually the alarm on your phone set to wake you up for the day. Anyway. I was dreaming I was getting crushed up against a concrete wall. Hellooooo Miss 4.

We've had a few injuries of late. As is the norm. A few collisions with other children, pieces of furniture, air. The usual. The frozen peas have been employed on many an occasion.

I hate the ones you can see happening but are powerless to stop.

Miss 5 was climbing all over the sofa chairs. I asked her to stop because if she kept at it she would fall over the back.

She fell over the back. There were tears.

Master 3 was sitting on the edge of the sofa near the tv. I asked him to sit on the sofa on his bottom and not on the edge. He fell off. Hit the tv table and has a rather smashing looking diagonal bruise up his ribcage.

I love it when they do things they aren't supposed to, and there is no possible way of hiding that they have done those things. I don't love it love it, but it's kinda fun.

The other day we managed to score a free fairy floss maker. Sensational. I have always wanted one but was never able to justify it. Firstly because nobody makes fairy floss very often, secondly I don't really eat sweets and thirdly I don't like the kids eating sweets.

No matter, it was free, and much as I hate sweets, I will eat the odd tiny piece of fairy floss because it is massively cool.

So I decided to dye the sugar, after testing the machine out with the white.

I dyed two lots. One pink, one blue.

Then I left them on the trays to dry before breaking the sugar apart. Miss 5 was home alone with me, this being yesterday late afternoon right before we were to pick up the younger two.

I was doing something or other and saw her run past me to the bathroom and close the door behind her.

Interesting.

She yelled "You can't come in here!!!"

Interesting. Again.

"I have to" I said. "I have some things I need to put in there."

I wasn't lying. I did have things to put in there. My spray on sunscreen arrived from Catch of the Day (addicted) as well as some other thing I had to put in there. A lipstick or goodness knows what. Some random bench find.

She came running out of the bathroom and into her room, shutting the door behind her.

Something's up here.

So I opened the door, after putting the things away in the bathroom.

"What's going on missy?" I asked Miss 5.

"I don't know" she said, both looking and sounding worried.

"I don't know what happened" she said, gesturing to her tongue.

Interesting.

It was blue.

"What have you done miss?"

"NOTHING! I haven't done anything!!!"

Sure you haven't.

"I'm not going to get cross, I just want you to tell me the truth."

And then the look. That sad puppy dog eye look.

"I know you told me not to, but I was in the kitchen and there was the sugar and it was blue and now I can't clean my tongue. I'm sorry mummy."

And I picked her up and cuddled her.

And I thanked her for being honest. I reinforced that she had done the wrong thing, but praised her for being honest about it. I don't want her to get down the track and not tell me things. I want her to always be able to tell me things, even if it is from her being naughty.

Which is why it made tonight difficult when she upended a candle that had not survived the heatwave. And when I went out there and asked what the smell was, knowing full well what the smell was, that being huge amounts of melted candle, she said "I know I wasn't supposed to mummy and I'm sorry."

AGH.

Foiled.

She even gave me a hug.

Wax. Everywhere.

Kids. Tempting to remove everything from the house until they are old enough to know that you look with your EYES and not with your HANDS. And thanks to some friends for reminding me of that old adage our parents used to tell us…….

Still. I'm pretty impressed with her. It's a big step.

Oh and in other news, hospital first week in February for the ears. Pretty darn quick IMHO.

They'll be hearing in no time. And ignoring me in no time after that, rather than just not hearing me. Which, much as it sounds far from ideal, is certainly better than not being able to hear me.

Love my mini ones. Frustrating as they can be. Wouldn't trade them for the world.

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