It happened again.

I accidentally had a massive night.

It started out so innocently. The kids left home around 6.30pm and an hour or so later I headed out with a friend for "a few drinks".

She even drove, because she, also, anticipated only a short and respectable evening.

It was not a short and respectable evening. Not by any stretch of the imagination.

Quite the contrary.

In fact, it ended in many rounds of shots, dancing (I don't dance) and a cab ride home somewhere between 2 and 3 o'clock (judging by the activity on my Facebook page - the only way one can accurately gauge these things).

And it was a fabulous night. I cannot recall laughing so much and having such a variety of conversations with people who I had never met before. But we will meet again, of that there is no doubt.

Amazing night. Truly amazing.

But, as with everything, there are effects.

I woke up at 10.05am this morning. My first thought was "I need a steak."

So I got up, put the kettle on, and proceeded to spend the next hour thawing out a steak, making red wine and mushroom sauce (from scratch of course) and cooking my massive scotch fillet to absolute perfection before lathering it in what could only be described as a veritable ocean of mushroom sauce.

And it was sensational. Just what the doctor ordered.

Then we had to go back and pick up my friend's car. Via Highpoint. Because of course the only thing you want to do after a massive night is go shopping.

And when we got there we needed food.

After getting a Coke I thought that would suffice. Then I saw someone eating a cheeseburger. And I had to have one.

So have one I did, complete with chips and a drink, although I had only intended to buy the cheeseburger alone. Did they "upsell" me? No. The reason I got the meal was because I knew that that meant I could get more water (to add to the 17 litres I drank before leaving home).

Food eaten, shops to visit.

I don't shop well. I'm really not a normal chick.

I don't find pleasure in browsing through clothes shops and trying things on. I derive far greater pleasure from, well, pretty well anything else to be honest.

My friend is the opposite, and is trying to change my ways somewhat. It won't work. But I admire her for trying. After all, had she not come with me on my expedition I would never have gone into the shop in which I eventually found something to buy, in replacement of another item I had returned that trip, which was in fact the sole reason we had gone shopping in the first place.

Clear as mud?

Good.

Moving on.

I bought an 8kg watermelon. It was $5.

Bargain.

It was a bit heavy though. And as I found out, if you put an 8kg watermelon on the back seat of the car and then drive down a hill, said watermelon will fall off the seat and proceed to roll all over the floor until you get home, in a not un-annoying manner.

I got home and figured I would just sloth for a bit. So I put on the air conditioner and got changed and realised I really wanted KFC.

I did not get KFC.

I made a salad.

Go me.

And then I did it. Half an hour of exercise.

Why?? I. Have. No. Idea.

This is a new thing for me, this whole "exercise" thing. First I can't be bothered. Second I don't see the point in sweating for the sake of sweating. And third, well, I truly suck at it. Probably because I never do it.

So that I did this in itself is quite remarkable. That I followed programs on my phone is even more astounding. That I looked as though I was having a seizure was unsurprising to say the least.

And I opted to do my first "full" half hour workout on a day where it was 41 degrees. And I had had a massive night.

Let's just say one thing. Being intelligent does not automatically make you smart in every way.

So now I am sitting here, still hot from my workout 2.5 hours ago, and knowing that I am going to hurt tomorrow. And I can't even sleep in because the kids will be back early early.

Fabulous.

I suppose I could go to bed early. But I think we all know that isn't going to happen.

I don't understand why though. I'm tired. I really should go to bed.

But I can't. Bedroom is too hot. I guess I could lie down on the sofa.

I'm just talking to myself here. Fair sign I should probably go.

I might go and have a tomato. Because I still want KFC. And I'm not getting it (silent sulk).

And I don't even have any bacon.

Oh the humanity.