"Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum.....?"

The number of times I have heard this call? Countless.

The number of times this call is repeated? Countless.

The number of times this call is followed by a question? Countless.

The number of times this call is followed by nothing? COUNTLESS.

"Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum......?"

"Yes darling?"

Nothing.

Silence.

"Did you actually want anything?"

"What?"

"You called me."

"Oh"

So I go. Back to washing dishes, or making beds, or folding washing, or something.

"Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum.......??"

"Yes darling."

Silence.

Nothing.

"Do you actually NEED anything??"

Silence.

Good. Lord. Seriously.

"Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum..........??"

"WHAT?????!!"

"I love you."

Bash. Head. Against. Wall. Now.

"I love you too baby." Then hug small child. And smile. And go into another room.

Wait for it.....

"Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum........??"

Breathe.

"Yes darling?"

Silence.

Ah kids. Nobody tells you these bits.